--Last edited by dmg on 2006-11-12 15:22:06 --

dmg, I can see the jazz musician in you shining through on this one. I find myself singing/chanting this poem more than "reading" it in the traditional sense. It has a great beat to it; I could hear the music in the back of my mind as I read through it. I should probably apologize in advance for this, but it sounded a bit like Creedance Clearwater Revival   I suppos the fun part of poetry is personal interpretation, though, so different readers will "hear" different music behind this poem.

Out of curiosity, where is "mud sleepy river?" Is it inspired by a real place?

I like this image:
meet me in the
newly-minted morning

It just feels so "pristine." Out here in Southern California (pollutionville) we don't see many of those mornings. I've seen a few up in Wyoming, though.

Also, good use of Biblical imagery:
yeah let's take that
thorny crown upon us
take the mood right up
and let it fall

The burden of love, perhaps? The crucifixion of the self that must sometimes accompany love?

Yeah, I have heard dmg play and sing this - and it's Creedance Clearwater Revival with Louisiana Blues - it's rich.  Worth hearing it.  I loved it the first time I heard the whole thing.  Raw, refined.

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Out of curiosity, where is "mud sleepy river?" Is it inspired by a real place?

Quick answer of this question ....

the image just came to me, abd it matched the C9 chord i was playing,  but later on i was thinking it might have come from a book i had just finished reading. Maybe it's a literary river.

In Arundhuti Roy's The God of Small Things there is a strong-flowing river that Velutha (Untouchable) swims across to make love to (upper caste) Ammu, ie "mommy." An act that sows the seeds of destuction for the whole family. .... 24 years later,  Ammu's then 7-year-old daughter,  Rahel, comes back and the river, diverted for irrigation purposes, is just a muddy trickle.

..... was thinkin' about that scene after i wrote this.

O yeah.... yeh, CCR might do this song. It is quite a trad-sounding country blues, kinda in their ballpark. Kind of a departure for me, from my usual "thang" tho.

(btw, very busy this weekend, but quick scanned your excerpts, and will read more fully and respond ASAP. Thanks for postin' them! )

Funny, I did think of that reference to the "God of Small Things" myself.  That river behind Rahel's house.  Neat.  It even begins to look like a tribute to the book.  Wow.

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The burden of love, perhaps? The crucifixion of the self that must sometimes accompany love?

Neat comment. That takes it deeper. Thanks.